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Avatar MrMario
Posted 04/08/08 - 11:40 PM:
Subject: Untitled
[My new stab at dialogue. Tell me what you think.]

By: Mario Viramontes II

(Two teens are sitting on a couch. Sam was recently laid off, and is reading the back of a movie box. His friend Robert is reading a book. The television is on, but neither of them is watching it.)

Sam: (Still reading the back of the box.) Ever wondered how, like, the Tinman got to the junk yard?

Robert: (Not looking away from his book) Hmm?

Sam: The Tinman. You know... Like... How, like... I mean... He just happened to be in the scrap heap at the time he rusted, or, was he thrown’ in there?

Robert: (Annoyed) What are you talkin’ about?

Sam: *sigh* ...Nothing.

Robert: (Looks back and forth between his book and Sam a few times before putting his book down) So how’d it happen?

Sam: Wha’?

Robert: You know. At the warehouse.

Sam: (Immediately) *tisk*...Damn. Not much happened. I was just stackin’ boxes of Jack Link’s one minute, and the next, I’m laid off. (Pause) But don’t think I didn’t get the last laugh though.

Robert: Why? What’d you... (He sees Sam smile and knows what happened ) Oh, shit. No way! You pulled it off? Did they notice anything?

Sam: Nahh. At least I don’t think they did. I mean, I think I spread the boxes out pretty evenly.

Robert: *scoffs*...What’d it go on?

Sam: Umm... Rockstar and Starbucks.

Robert: Well, at least you didn’t get it on anything good.

Sam: Yea’. (Pause) Wanna’ watch 28?

Robert: Nah, I’m good.

Sam: (Surprised) What? Why?

Robert: Ehh... Zombie movies just don’t get to me like they use to.

Sam: Well, I know zombie movies are kinda’ farfetched, but, 28 is at least plausible. They’re not even zombies in this one. They’re just really, super pissed.

Robert: No, Sam. It’s not plausible. The rage virus and how it’s spread, I can understand. It’s kinda’ funny to think about after the “Bird Flu” and “Mad Cow Disease” a few years ago. But anyways, the only things they know how to do are eating and hunting down their food. But I mean, damn. They can run the hundred meter dash in, like, ten or less. And they do that for like the entire day. To maintain that much energy you need to eat a lot. Hence the main threat in zombie movies. The other plausible thing I saw in the movie was that they starved. But that would have happened a hell of a lot sooner than 28 days. The metabolism was working so fast, and absorbing their food at an alarming rate, that they had to constantly eat.

Sam: All right! I’ll take it up with Danny Boyle next time then. But what about the Romero zombies? They are dead, do they don’t need to breath or have a metabolism.

Robert: Then why feed?

Sam: ...Dammit.

Robert: Ha, ha. Score.

Sam: Ah, sucks to your assmar. Thanks for ruining every zombie movie for me ya’ dick.

Robert: That deserved a victory sip. Toss me a Dew.

Sam: Aw. Sorry to brick on your parade, but, I just drank the last one, and all we have left is cream soda.

Robert: Oh, come on, man. That craps worse than piss covered Starbucks and Rockstar.

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Avatar Brinni
Posted 04/11/08 - 4:26 PM:

I really liked how laid-back the scene was. It was very enjoyable for me to read.
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Posted 04/12/08 - 10:07 AM:

I'll second that. Very relaxing. ^^

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Posted 04/12/08 - 12:12 PM:

makes me think of stoners. smiling face i guess that's another way of saying it's pretty laid back. sort of the calm before the storm, as if i'm expecting something intense to happen any second and surprise the hell out of these two. like zombies showing up. good lead-in for an adventure thumb up
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Avatar MrMario
Posted 04/16/08 - 7:12 PM:

Thanks guys.
It's funny how you say "stoners" Lib. I was thinking of Randal and Dante from Clerks when I wrot this. I know they arent stoners but I guess I made that connection some how.

-Mr. Mario
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